Four Simple Promises That Can Change Your Life

Inspired by “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz

I recently stumbled upon a book that felt less like a self-help manual and more like a soul whisper:

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Don Miguel Ruiz.

And let me tell you, it’s not one of those “read and forget” kind of books.

It’s a read, pause, reflect, re-read, highlight everything, then accidentally memorize the whole thing kind of book.

It gave me a blueprint—not for achieving more, but for uncomplicating everything.

So here’s what I’ve taken from it.

Here’s what I now live by.

Here’s what I fall back on when life starts to feel like a group chat I never signed up for.

1. Be Impeccable with Your Word

A personal promise I didn’t know I needed.

I used to think “being impeccable with your word” meant giving grand speeches or never saying the wrong thing. But it’s not about eloquence. It’s about integrity.

It’s about not using my words to attack myself.

It’s about not indulging in drama under the disguise of “just venting.”

And it’s definitely about not calling myself names in my head that I’d never use for a friend.

Now, I speak differently.

To others, yes. But especially to myself.

And honestly? That inner tone shift alone… changed my life.

2. Don’t Take Anything Personally

Easier said than done… until you realize it’s never really about you.

I wrote an entire Substack post on this one alone because it’s that important.

If you haven’t read it yet, go check it out—especially if you’ve ever found yourself internalizing someone else’s bad day as a personal failure.

Read: How to Stop Taking Things Personally?

I used to carry other people’s moods like emotional luggage. If someone was cold, I thought I did something wrong. If someone lashed out, I wondered what I triggered.

But here’s the liberating truth:

People are living inside their own stories.

And their reactions say way more about them than they ever say about you.

Once you understand this, you stop making everything a referendum on your worth.

You stop trying to decode every tone, text, and silence.

You stop exhausting yourself with over-analysis and finally breathe.

3. Don’t Make Assumptions

This one hit me like a gentle slap.

Because I was the Michaelangelo of assumptions.

I could sculpt an entire narrative from a single “k.”

I’d write novels in my head starring other people’s opinions of me—fictional, dramatic, exhausting novels.

This agreement taught me to ask, to clarify, to express.

To say, “Hey, did you mean this?” instead of, “They probably hate me and are forming a WhatsApp group about it.”

Turns out, most of the drama we fear only exists in our imagination.

And most people are too busy thinking about themselves to be plotting our downfall.

4. Always Do Your Best

Your best will look different every day. That’s not failure—it’s wisdom.

Some days, I’m unstoppable.

Other days, just getting out of bed feels like crossing an ocean.

But doing my best doesn’t mean perfection. It means showing up.

With what I have.

In the state I’m in.

Without using yesterday’s energy level as today’s benchmark.

And here’s the magic part:

When I do my best (even if it’s a humble, half-charged best), I sleep better.

No regrets. No shame spiral. Just peace.

One Agreement at a Time

Here’s what surprised me: I didn’t have to nail all four at once.

Even just living one of them—like speaking kindly to myself—started to untangle years of inner chaos.

You don’t need 50 productivity hacks.

You don’t need 100 podcasts telling you how to be your “highest self.”

You just need these four inner promises.

They sound simple, and they are.

But they are anything but easy.

And yet—if you live by them, slowly, patiently, one breath at a time—

They don’t just change your behavior.

They change your being.

Final reflection

I started Elevating Lives to change my life.

Not by adding more—but by simplifying deeply.

And these four agreements feel like the kind of spiritual decluttering we all need.

Fewer rules. More freedom.

Less noise. More inner clarity.

Fewer masks. More peace.

I’m not perfect at any of this.

But I promise you this: I’m trying. Every single day.

And maybe that’s the fifth secret agreement—

Try. With love. Always.

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